Saturday, December 2 — Laugh at Bill Burr on Saturday
Stand-up comedy will be at its best this weekend with two touring comedians ready to bring the funny to Tucson.
Former "Silicon Valley" star T.J. Miller performed at Centennial Hall Thursday on the University of Arizona campus.
Bill Burr will play the Diamond Center at the Desert Diamond Casino, 1100 W. Pima Mine Road, this Saturday.
Burr is more established as a comic, with a solid presence on the stand-up circuit going back to the early 1990s. His impressive resume includes his own podcast (Bill Burr's Monday Morning Podcast) and five hour-long specials, include one that was released in January on Netflix.
Burr's show begins at 8 p.m.
Saturday, December 2 — Taste tamales at annual festival
This family-friendly Tucson Tamal & Heritage Festival, now in its 13th year, celebrates the tastes, smells and variation of tamales from the Southwest and Mexico.
It starts at 10 a.m. and runs through 5 p.m. Saturday, Dec. 2, at Casino del Sol’s AVA, 5655 W. Valencia Road.
Admission is free, but groups and individuals selling tamales are being given the opportunity to raise funds.
The festival includes a tamale contest, live local entertainment, food, arts and crafts, and farmers-market vendors. More than 10,000 people attended in 2016.
Saturday, December 2 — Catch a cult-film icon talking Christmas
You won’t find John Waters shopping the bargains at the big-box stores this holiday season.
“It’s not that I’m a snob about it; I go into way worse thrift shops,” said the legendary filmmaker of such cult hits as “Hairspray,” “Cry-Baby” and “Serial Mom.” “I love the high and the low; it’s the middle I have trouble with. And in Walmart, no one works there so I don’t know how to go in there. It’s so huge, as big as a football field, with not one person to answer a question.”
But when he comes to Tucson this weekend with the 2017 edition of his “John Waters Christmas” show, he might sneak into a thrift store downtown. His mission: Find the perfect gift for little to no money.
“I think expensive presents are sometimes awkward. Maybe I don’t like you that much to accept it. And that puts the other person on the spot, too,” the 71-year-old Waters explained.
He’ll lay out his gift-giving philosophy and other musings at his show, which will ask the really big questions about Christmas:
- Is Christmas now a gay holiday?
- Is Santa a bear?
- What to do about the perennial political commentator in the family.
We caught up with Waters early this month to talk about his Rialto Theatre monologue show, what he wants for Christmas and his youthful thrift store misadventures.
Is it wrong to wish you a Merry Christmas?
“No, no it’s not. I can understand, though, that if you do say Merry Christmas to someone and they say, ‘How dare you assume I believe in the birth of Jesus.’ That’s a fair response. My Christmas show addresses that, too, that I had a lovely Christmas and I celebrated. But not everyone in the world does and we assume they do as our entitlement to Christmas or something, which I address hopefully in a humorous way. ... I think everybody needs some holiday cheer this year.”
President Trump wants every American to say “Merry Christmas.”
“I don’t think Muslims are going to say that. I don’t think Jews are going to say it. I don’t think atheists are going to say it, and that is why I support the Satanic Temple. I’m hardly a satanist, because that’s a religion, too, but they fight the separation of church and state in a very amusing, humorist (way), which I’m completely for.”
So what’s your take on Christmas 2017?
“I talk about crime. I talk about miracles. I talk about what I want for Christmas. What I want to give you for Christmas. Sex and Christmas. Is Christmas now a gay holiday? Is Santa a bear? It’s so confusing, now, Christmas, and it seems like it’s almost year-round. Even in Provincetown (Massachusetts), where I live in the summer, there’s a Christmas shop that’s open in the summer. People are shopping for Christmas decorations in August? I find that amazing.”
What tops your Christmas wish list?
“I always say books are the best present ever, books that I don’t know about and would love and I would pay a lot of money for but you found at a thrift shop for a nickel. That would be the perfect present.”
And mixing politics with the family eggnog?
“Bring a whistle. Otherwise the Christmas tree is going to get knocked over. There’s going to be a lot more of that this year. People storming out of the house, which I could be one of them.”
You missed your big annual Christmas party in Baltimore last year when you had to have emergency kidney stone surgery. Why didn’t you just postpone the party?
“It happened that day. I couldn’t cancel; I had 200 people coming. So I said just have it (without me) and I was home the next day. It was in the press; my agent heard I died. It got so out of hand. And then Carrie Fisher died and there were articles, ‘Aren’t you glad John never died.’”
What are your favorite thrift stores?
“I love the ones where they don’t know what they are doing,” or the true value of the merchandise on the shelves. “Those are the best ones where you can buy things for a nickel. We used to go to Value Village and go in and bring a crayon and stapler and put the tags back on, staple ’em to the sleeves. Isn’t that horrible, stealing from a thrift shop. I’m for stealing from the Salvation Army because they refuse to take money from a gay organization, which I never forgot. So I’m for shoplifting at Salvation Army. I don’t care; I’m proud of it.”
What: "A John Waters Christmas 2017."
Featuring: Legendary filmmaker/humorist John Waters ("Hairspray," "Serial Mom").
When: 8 p.m. Saturday, Dec. 2.
Where: Rialto Theatre, 318 E. Congress St.
Tickets: $32 to $110 through ticketfly.com
- Cathalena E. Burch
Saturday, December 2 — See pretty lights, drink beer at the zoo
Take two wildly popular events — Zoo Lights and Brew at the Zoo — and what do you get? Yet a new third event — Brew Lights, which takes place Saturday with the Reid Park Zoo again teaming up with Craft Tucson, which features a dozen of Tucson’s favorite brewers.
That means enjoying Zoo Lights while sampling some craft beer from local breweries amidst twinkling lights, falling snow, carousel rides, music and Santa.
The zoo cafe will have food and drink, as well as s’mores stations. Freddy Parish Band will provide the tunes.
Brew Lights details:
When: 6-8 p.m. Saturday, Dec. 2.
Where: Reid Park Zoo, 3400 Zoo Court.
Best Value: $35 for a VIP Ticket that includes four tastings of beer (additional beer tickets may be purchased at the event) plus a Brew Lights tasting glass. ZOO Members get $5 off.
Tickets (Purchase tickets online at reidparkzoo.org for ease of entry).
$35 for Adult VIP (21+ only)
$30 for Member VIP (21+ only)
$10 for Adults (not doing beer tasting)
$6 for Children (2-14)
Children under 2 are free
Members get $2 off Zoo Lights admission
Saturday, December 2 — Bid on bicycle-inspired art at BICAS auction
Old bicycles don’t fade away at BICAS.
If they can’t be refurbished and ridden again, they — or their parts — are often turned into art.
You’ll find a lot of that at the 22nd annual BICAS Art Auction, slated for Saturday, Dec. 2.
Local artists have donated works that echo the bicycle theme.
You may find a sculpture made out of a wheel, or a necklace incorporating screws from a bike, or a painting with a bicycle at its center.
The buildup to the auction promises as much fun as the auction itself. From 6-10 p.m. Dec. 1 and 11 a.m.-6 p.m. Dec. 2, you can preview the works; early bidding is available 11 a.m.-4 p.m. Dec. 2.
Then the silent auction is 6-9 p.m. Dec. 2.
There will be music, puppet shows and brew — specifically, the English-style brown ale, Dragoon BICAS Brown.
It’s all happening at The Art Gallery, 1122 N. Stone Ave. More information at bicas.org.
- Kathleen Allen
Saturday, December 2 — Look for Nordic, German gifts for the holidays
If you want to buy your family members something unique for the holiday season, plan to visit the German Winter Market at Desert Sky Community School and the Nordic Guild Fair at Streams in the Desert Lutheran Church, this Saturday.
Each event will have gifts and cuisine specific to the regions they represent.
The Nordic Guild Fair runs from 9 a.m. to 3 p.m. and will feature dance, music and food, as well as knitted items, pulla, blueberry tarts and Finnish chocolate.
Streams in the Desert is at 5360 E. Pima St.
The German Winter Market, at 1350 N. Arcadia Ave., will feature cuisine from German Food Station and Haus of Brats, German beverages, music, horse-drawn carriage rides and multiple vendors. It runs from 10 a.m. to 5 p.m.
Saturday, December 2-Sunday, December 3 — Shop vintage at the Downtown Clifton
Expect ten rooms full of vintage clothes, toys, barware and other pieces of the past at the Downtown Clifton's Vintage Market, 485 S. Stone Ave., this Saturday and Sunday.
The boutique inn will have dealers selling their vintage treasures, live music from Golden Boots and several other local outfits, You Sly Dog serving food and plenty to drink.
The market runs from 10 a.m. to 6 p.m. daily.
If you need more, head to the Medella Vina Ranch, 4450 S. Houghton Road, this Sunday for the biggest ongoing antique fair in town. Official start-time for that fair is 8 a.m.