Q: One of my star employees has developed a very negative attitude. During the past three years, I have assigned "Kevin" to desirable projects, given him special bonuses and made him a team leader. But in the past few months, he has become increasingly arrogant and uncooperative.
Kevin does not reply to my emails and withholds important information. He often comes late to meetings and sometimes skips them altogether. Most recently, he said that he does not respect my leadership style. I replied that whether he likes my style or not, I'm still his manager. If I officially reprimand Kevin, I'm afraid he might leave. I would hate to lose him because he has so much potential.
A: Your star performer would appear to be angry about something that happened a few months back. Because he's uncomfortable discussing the real issue, Kevin is using passive-aggressive behavior to send you a message.
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Try to recall the approximate date when Kevin's attitude seemed to shift, then search your memory for any event which might have made him feel slighted or insulted. But if nothing comes to mind, you will have to ask.
For example: "Kevin, I've realized that our relationship started getting worse around mid-October. I've tried to figure out what went wrong, but I honestly have no idea. We worked well together for a long time, so I would really like to know what happened. Have I done something to anger or disappoint you?"
Once you identify the root cause of Kevin's unhappiness, a productive talk may follow. But if he refuses to talk, you have no choice but to deal with this as a performance issue. Kevin needs to understand that, regardless of how he feels, maintaining a cooperative relationship with one's boss is a basic job expectation.
Q: When I asked about a raise several months ago, my manager said no money was available for pay increases. I was recently told in confidence, however, that a newly hired co-worker has a much higher salary than mine, even though I am our department's top producer. How can I tactfully tell my manager that I am aware of this discrepancy without revealing my source?
A: If you focus only on your colleague's pay, your boss will probably reply that he can't discuss individual salaries, and that will be the end of the conversation. But if you are absolutely sure this information is correct, consider using it to leverage your own request for an increase. For example: "The last time we discussed raises, salary budgets were very tight. However, I recently learned that our newest employee is being paid more than anyone else. Since I am the top producer, I think it would be only fair to revisit the topic of my compensation. When would be a good time to talk about this?"
If your boss asks how you obtained this information, the only honest response is that you were told in confidence. This may irritate him, however, so you'll have to decide whether to take that risk.
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