Would you consider giving your child an “old man” haircut as a form of discipline?
A barber in Snellville, Georgia, garnered national attention last week for doing just that for his customers. The barber offers what he calls the “Benjamin Button Special,” free of charge, to parents of misbehaving kids three days a week.
If you’re unfamiliar with Benjamin Button, the cut involves shaving the hair off the top of the child’s head, until he looks like an old man. That’s based on the 2008 film “The Curious Case of Benjamin Button,” that starred Brad Pitt as a man who starts aging backwards.
We asked what other parents and a parenting consultant thought about this form of discipline. Here’s what a few had to say:
“It is never acceptable to intentionally make a child feel humiliated or intrinsically diminished as a form of discipline. Children do not learn or absorb life lessons by being shamed or punished. In contrast, they learn through consistent boundaries, a firm grounding in family life and realistic, age-appropriate consequences when necessary. The crucial point Mr. Fredrick and his supporters are missing is that mistakes and bad choices provide important opportunities for adults to respectfully redirect, guide and educate children in productive ways.” — Beth Garrett, parenting consultant.
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“I think the punishment should fit the misbehavior. Humiliation usually isn’t something I support but every kid is different.” — Katrina Gloudeman, mother of one.
“This is not a first offense punishment. However, given repeated offenses I’d say drastic measures might be called for. You have to know your child. A headstrong child who is repeatedly mouthy and willful, is much less likely to be permanently scarred than a shy, timid or bashful child. Children today are entirely too sheltered and far too often do not have an appropriate grasp of cause and effect or consequence. We have young adults sitting in courtrooms whose lives have been tragically altered all over this country who cannot understand what they’ve done wrong, like Casey Anthony, or those boys from Yale. Self esteem can be repaired but shattered futures are unrepairable.” — Jared Vega, father of one.
“I don’t think we should jump on the so-called bandwagon and use a popular punishment just because it has gained attention. I think we need to use our judgment when punishing and do what’s best for your family. I’m really not sure if I would use this type of punishment.” — Ginger Begishe, mother of three.
“It is never right to humiliate someone by making them feel ashamed and foolish. Do not injure their dignity and self respect, especially publicly. This young man would be humiliated in front of the whole school. This young man is powerless, do not shame him.” Janet Barbrick, mother of three, grandmother of six.
“What if this is the hair he has when he is older? Is that a punishment then? I could think of a lot worse “disciplines.” Jeri VanAntwerp, mother of two.
