The cool fall air came late Saturday afternoon as the extended Rivera family gathered under a large tree for a sad celebration. A folding picnic table held a large steaming olla of pozole, a pot of Mexican soup of hominy, pinto beans and pork, a sign the family was settling in for a long visit.
The family of David Ray Rivera came to celebrate his 27th birthday. The family ringed his onyx grave marker at South Lawn Cemetery to remember his life.
"We don't want to let him go," said his mother, Alejandrina Rivera. Neither does Ramon Rivera, David's father.
No one wants to let go: David's sisters, Stephanie and Belinda; his nana Martha Rivera; his tías Margaret and Virginia; his cousins, his stepmother, Carol, and stepfather, Gerald; his homeboys Carlos Cuestas, Carlos Borboa and Johnny Lucero; and his girlfriend, Sonia Cordova.
People are also reading…
They can't let him go. They shouldn't have to.
In less than a month hundreds of Southern Arizona families will visit cemeteries on Nov. 2, Día de los Muertos. But nearly every day is the day of the dead for the Rivera family. Someone from David's circle of life visits his grave to remember him, to mourn him, to talk to him.
David died in July 2006 after fighting lupus for six years. He was valiant during his sickest days and optimistic on better days.
In fact, said the family, David had more good days in the six years he was in and out of the hospital. He seemed to be making progress, they said.
Even up until a few days before David died, his family believed he would live.
No one realized how sick he was. His death was unexpected.
David was a champion wrestler at Sunnyside High School. He was small, but huge in his 125-pound weight class.
In his junior year, "Little Champ," as he was called, placed third in the state prep wrestling championship. The following year, 1999, David won the state title.
His mother said David lived to wrestle. He went to Kansas University on a wrestling scholarship. But he didn't finish the season. The wrestling coach called Tucson to tell his family David was sick.
On David's gravestone the family planted a small KU flag, a larger American flag and four dozen red roses. A picture of David in a wrestler's pose is burned into the large, flat stone. A biblical verse and a hunting scene are inscribed as well.
David and his father loved to hunt deer. The last time they went, David became too ill to walk. His father hoisted David on his shoulders and took him away.
As David's medical condition worsened, his doctors decided he should have a kidney transplant. His stepmother tested as a match and Carol Rivera agreed to donate one of her two kidneys.
But less than one month before the transplant procedure, David died.
A couple of nights before his death, his sister Belinda spent the night with him at University Medical Center. She said he woke, saw her and said, "Belle, I love you so much."
There were more memories and tears and smiles that brought David's family and friends together at the cemetery. As the sun went down and the sweaters came out, the family continued their vigil.
The vigil may last a lifetime because David will not be forgotten.
Nancy Guthrie's Tucson neighbors: Life with streamers 'unbearable'
