If our time is characterized by dishonesty, what can we do about it? — Richard Kyte

Christian B. Miller thinks so. In his recent book, "The Honesty Crisis: Preserving Our Most Treasured Virtue in an Increasingly Dishonest World", he describes what has gone wrong in politics, news, personal relationships, education, entertainment and religion.

The book is a follow-up to his work on The Honesty Project, a research project involving dozens of scholars who have been studying both the nature and the value of honesty. Some of their findings are just what you might expect; others are surprising.

Take, for instance, a study asking participants to rank the 60 characteristics that describe a person they would like, a person they would respect, and a person they would be confident they understand. In all three cases, the leading characteristic was honesty.

This means that honesty is arguably the virtue we care about more than any other. And yet, we tend not to name it when discussing the characteristics that matter most in our personal and professional lives. We also don’t talk about it much in our everyday conversations. And that leads to the central claim of Miller’s book: honesty is, paradoxically, our most treasured and, at the same time, our most neglected virtue.

This claim is consistent with my own experience teaching ethics for over 30 years. For most of that time, I have been asking my students to write down the names of people who have been most influential in their lives and then to write next to each name the characteristic that comes to mind when they think of each person. I wish I had been keeping a record of the responses I received over the years, because right now, I cannot recall honesty ever being mentioned.

Maybe that’s because honesty is sometimes overlooked as being just about telling the truth. When we stop to think about it, we soon realize that it stands for much more than that. It stands for reliability, dependability, sincerity and trustworthiness. If you are honest, you keep your promises. You give your word and keep it. We have so many words that describe a particular aspect of honesty that we tend to overlook it.

But that is a mistake. Especially in times of social disruption as we are living through today, it is important to think carefully about the virtues we want to live by ourselves and encourage in others. Honesty is, arguably, the most important.

What happens when a society becomes more dishonest? Four things, according to Miller.

The first thing is that trust erodes. In the United States, both institutional and social trust have been declining steadily since at least the early 1970s. There are many reasons for this, but the key one is that most people no longer believe the people and institutions they interact with regularly are honest.

The second thing is that our relationships suffer. We see this in the decline in friendship. Only 12% of people today have 10 or more close friends. In 1990, approximately 33% reported having 10 or more close friends.

The third thing is that there is more disrespect. When we respect someone, we treat them as having genuine worth, not just as having instrumental value. Respect involves a certain degree of politeness and consideration in the ways we talk to and about one another; it also involves demonstrating genuine care for others’ well-being.

The fourth thing is that fear grows. I see increasing fear everywhere I go. I see it in the rising rates of anxiety, especially among the young. I see it in the worry parents express about their children's futures. If we believed we lived in an honest society, we would experience much less fear because we would know we were surrounded by people who were looking out for us.

These are all good reasons to believe we are undergoing a crisis of honesty, and they point us toward a better future.

We can begin by asking ourselves: What kind of person do I want to be? Do I want to be dependable, reliable, trustworthy, caring and genuine? Then I can start by cultivating honesty in every word I speak and every action I take. I can try to speak simply and directly and let the consequences take care of themselves. I can strive to be respectful, kind and courteous, even when people around me are rude or self-serving.

Then we can follow up by asking: What kind of people do I want to be surrounded by? Do I want my children, my employees, my coworkers, my political representatives to be people I can trust? Then we should make it clear to them that we value honesty above all else.

This isn’t complicated, but it is hard. It requires having a clear purpose and following through on it daily. If we value honesty, we must name it and claim it.