Dear J.T. & Dale: My boss has recently seemed really upset with me. We used to have a great relationship, but in the last month, he’s been distant and short in his responses to me. I asked him if anything was wrong, and he answered “no,” but something is not right. What can I do to get things back to normal? — Samantha
J.T.: The next step is to demonstrate your commitment to maintaining a positive relationship. You might consider sending a thoughtful, professionally worded email or requesting a brief meeting. Re-express your perception of the change in your relationship, affirm your value in maintaining a strong, professional relationship, and ask for specific feedback or areas of improvement.
DALE: But, never forget the wisdom in this simple statement: It’s not all about you. How is he getting along with other employees? Pay close attention because there’s a good chance this is about him, not you. If you suspect there’s something going on in his career or life, then you need to be patient and supportive.
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J.T.: Yes, it’s important to continue performing your duties to the best of your ability. Sometimes, workplace dynamics shift due to external pressures or personal issues unrelated to work. By staying consistent in your performance, you show your professionalism and adaptability.
Meanwhile, broaden your perspective. Engage with colleagues for general feedback on your work and behavior. Sometimes, peers can provide insights that we might miss ourselves.
DALE: This brings us to a skill that nobody wants to claim: being a good office politician. You should strive to be everyone’s favorite teammate, the one they know they can count on. How do you do that? With a great attitude, of course, but also with great ears — you should know the goals, dreams and fears of everyone you work with — and also with a great heart, truly caring about each one of them, including your boss.
